Here comes the rain again! Falling on my face like a Kennedy. Falling on my head like a music ocean! I love the Urythramics! Especially Amy Lummox! She’s all adrogynous and stuff, and that’s so incredibly sexy! But to who, I have no idea. It’s either everyone or no one, I’m not sure.
“But Hotspur,” you’re probably wondering out loud, making the people next to you in the Walmart look at you funny, “don’t you like all those androgynous Japanese bands, to say nothing of Bowie?” Yes. I do. And to you I say ‘negai wa anatta ni furisosogu sotto kanashimi wo koete’, and also ‘golden years, gold, wha wha wha’. Turn and face the strange.
Wednesday, as those of you who listened to my recordings and read my Daily Prompt musical post may know, I hurt my back shoveling snow. So Thursday and Friday, I went into the big jumbo bottle of ibuprofen and took three of those huge white pills each day. I brought a couple with me each day, plus the bottle of acetominophen. I felt all funny inside, to put it mildly and cleanly and less disgustingly.
Well, today I still felt a little pain, so I went into the big jumbo bottle of ibuprofen and took three of those little red pills, and took a couple to bring work with me. And I drove in the rain, not thinking about it. And I went to work, and to some meetings, and went about my day.
Then it hit me. Little red pills? Little red fucking pills? LITTLEREDFUCKINGPILLS? OMG, what the fuck did I take on Thursday and Friday, then?
Then it REALLY hit me. What did I take on Thursday and Friday? Fucking FIBER LAXATIVE PILLS, that’s what. And you can just go eat a bug, people who are laughing right now. I know I have a lot of regular readers, AND NOW I”M PRETTY FUCKING REGULAR MYSELF, thank you very much.
IN other news, I accidentally set my clock ahead an hour and a day, so this is from the future! OOOOOHHHHHHH SPOOOKYYYYYY! Right? And now, I’m going to the gym. I have some issues to work out. Like, for example, I have not yet worked off the holiday weight. Though, with these laxat- SHUT UP!
Edward Hotspur
BAHAHAHAHHHHAAAAAAHAHHAAAAAAAAA. HA. HA. HAAAAAA.
I just ate a bug in your honor, they are FULL OF FIBER!
And protein! And fingernails are high in calcium!
I just double checked to make sure I’ve been overdosing on Ibuprofin for the last 24 hours, and not laxatives, but then I realized that we don’t own any laxatives. Are those for old people?
They’re for everyone – like love, or happiness, or swamp ass.
Your ass should feel nice and relaxed by now, yes?
It should. I’ve been shaking it for days.
Are you out of toilet paper?
No, why do you ask?
Thought that was why you were shaking your ass all weekend!
It’s because I’m dropping it like it’s hot.
Yeah,laxatives will do that to a person! I bet you need hemmorrhoid cream nowm don’t you?
You sure are fascinated by my ass.
No, just by your movements…
BAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA. A.
Like Jagger.
Ugh. I don’t like Jagger’s moves. I adore Adam Levine’s moves,though!
I have just wasted the last 10 minutes of my life trying to figure out what “negai wa anatta ni furisosogu sotto kanashimi wo koete” means. Google tells me it’s Swahili, and the English translation is “He negai of TTA is furisosogu Sotto himself any kanashimi koete”. I have my doubts. Kuacha basi, kuku wangu katika wagonjwa
“My wishes pour down on you, softly passing over the sadness.” It’s from the song Utakata, by Kagrra. Very beautiful song it is, too.
Mystery solved! Thanks!
Bug eaten…..still laughing!!
This is the first time your shit ever made any sense… hahahahahahahahha…oh man…sniffle…
Good one! lol
SOL… I am smiling out loud.
You should use that SOL thing in more family tweets@!
Roger, wilco, over and out.
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