Once upon a time, a guy started keeping a journal. Since he only wrote when he was sufficiently motivated, he ended up only writing during superlative moments – the highest highs, and the lowest lows. And since nothing much else was going on in his life, the journal ended up being primarily about his girlfriends. Later, he got too busy, or whatever else, and he stopped writing in it.
Several years later, he picked it up again, flipped to a random place, and began reading. He read all about how Ex-Girlfriend A treated him poorly, and did him wrong, and how she made him feel, and what he was listening to, and… then he saw her name. Why, it wasn’t Ex-Girlfriend A after all! It was Ex-Girlfriend C! But this time, he was a little older and wiser, so he started from the beginning. And slowly he began to realize something…
A pattern. He had been going through a pattern of choosing a certain type of girl, a little immature, a little needy, a little jealous and possessive, emotionally distant and stunted, etc. And all those qualities were present in the first girl he ever fell in love with. He realized that he had been choosing the same kind of woman over and over, and that kind of woman was wrongwrongwrong!
He stopped looking for any type of woman, reasoning that he might be missing some qualities or traits that he might like but that he didn’t know existed. Sort of like eating only chocolate and vanilla ice cream, and never getting to enjoy the chocolate chip cookie doughs, and the moose tracks, and the peppermints.
And now he’s been married 16 years.
See what I’m saying?